PTC visit

Or rather, the PTC visited me this time.

I had my intake this morning. Urine, blood, measurements. Went over pills and my symptoms and my priorities in treatment. As always, wanted much more of their time.

Its been 2 years since my last visit. More. I looked at my prescription and realized I had really drifted. I dd not recall that I had been prescribed acetyl L carnitine. Of course, its recommended for blood glucose and insulin disturbances. ok, so that was dumb to have forgotten.

I learned that B-12 is not jsut to prevent deficiencies, but also to neutralize methyl groups. This is why we are presecribed Cyanocobalamin, and not methylcynocobalamin [SP]. It uses methyl groups before it passes the blood brain barrier.

I am taking WAY more zinc than recommended. I realized I was supposed to be down to 60 mg a day.

I am taking way too much Folate, but this I knew. They talked to me about down regulation, and apparently, when I reduce the dos,e I will crash. yea crashing. Still, gotta get done.

I need to take more vitamin C. Hard, that one makes me really edgy.

I told the doc- you want to imagine how I feel? pour yourself 6 cups of coffee and drink them. Wait 30 minutes. Thats how I feel every moment of every day. Especially right before bed. Except when the depression is in.

I love how they dont treat you like you are crazy. No one immediately throws up thier hands and recommends you see a shrink. Now, psychs are great ideas, but to me, thats a doctor copping out. They can recommend you see a psych, but I feel that they have an obligation to look at other causes. So many doctors seem ot see me fall off thier flow chart, and the catch all "See a pscyh" kicks in. At the PTC, they will say, hmmm, I dont know. ANd look into it. And acknowledge that there are some things that are what they are and that you will have to deal with them, perhaps with a psych, but they dont throw up thier hands and give up on you so fast.

The nurse, G, he was pretty good. He and I had an interesting conversation at the end. He told of a time when he was working in a psych ward in Chicago. He said one woman's condition was almost completely resolved when she moved to SF. It was a question of finding an environment that reflects your reality. Then you dont feel so crazy.

I thought about this. There are definitely some people around whom I feel more crazy. They are people, perhaps, whose cultural assumptions and approaches to life are so at odds with mine that I feel that I must be deficient. What is that quote, "I thought they were crazy, but I got outvoted." And places too. I wonder if SF is so soothing because it respects a life way more closely approximating my manic rip through life. Rule cultures really make me feel nuts. Of course, I AM nuts, but thats besides the point. Anyway, interesting point from G.

Also from G, apparently some parents are finding that a nicotine path resolves their childrens's ADD better than anything else. I have commented before aboutt he soothing calming effect of tobacco. Interesting approach. I dont know that I will give it a go, but its in the idea locker. For now, the occasional cigar is a wonderful drug.

Well, thats it until I get the results and the phone consult. That and that I am 1400 lighter in the pocket. Good thing too, all that extra cash was dragging me down