Not forgotten
I have not forgotten this blog. Its just that I am in the midst of a major paradigm shift, that is to everyone but me, expremely underwhelming. I never suspected that recovery would teach me so much about my illness. At least I thought I had little left to learn. But the more I look at the unwinding of the sickness, the more the emphasis shifts from a genetic timebomb which exploded beneath me, to an image of extreme stresses pressing my body/mind to its predetermined genetic breaking point.
The key was not realizing how long it could take to recover. One would think that 5 years of coddling the body would produce health, especially if it were only the presence of stressors that made the body ill. One would be wrong. That is my conclusion.
As you may or may not know, or care, I continue to sack the internet and popular media, as well as journals and medical books that I can understand for expereinces that are similar to mine. Well, I am beggining, strangely now, to find more tales that are similar, though not the same, and they are instructive.
I found the tale of a woman who had been ill like I had. She had also gotten ill as I had, through years of physical and nutritional punishment on her body. She decribes long days of work, fuled by low fat vegetarian cuisine. As she ate less meat, she grew more suscpetible to indigestion in the meats she did eat. soon gone were fish, eggs, and then milk. She drank fruit juices, and ate brown rice. Soon she was not able to digest fat well. But she persevered. In the end her system wekaened, and she broke. Her problems were similar to mine, severe lassitude, dizzyness, extraperceptions, headaches, paranoia, dark depression. The interesting thing I learned was this...she went to a chinese herbalist, and then later reintroduced appropriate nutrrition into her body, and it STILL TOOK 20 YEARS TO REGAIN HER HEALTH. Its a version of the same thing I did to myself, and a version of the same approach I took to healing. I was always wary to attribute all the problems to the abuse I visited on my body in 4 years of college water polo, 7.5 hours 3 days a week, 6 hours the other 4, and a vegetarian diet, that turned to a vegan diet, that turned to a low/no fat vegan diet, add a dash of starvation, and a bit of psychological stress and toxic water supply, because I reversed that course and fed my body ample amounts,good quiality fats, healing broths, fermented foods, raw fruits and vegetables, and supplements like only my loyal readers care to know...and it STILL TOOK 6 years to turn it around. Ok, its not 180 degrees yet, and the clock is still ticking, but the point is that I now view what is left to heal as the ravages of a constant state of stressor abuse.
I drew interesting comparisons and lessons from men in POW camps in WWII. Not to compare whatever horrors those men endured, but at an abstract level the stimuli ar ethe same- malnutrition, starvation, and grueling labor. I read their cases. many of them did not recover their health for decades, if ever.
Well, that what I am thinking of right now. I am not addressing hypoglycemia except as it is a symptom. I am healing my hypothalmus, I guess, the master endocrine gland, and healing a damaged digestive tract and all that entails.
The health is good these days. Hardly notice a thing. Lets say 5 days of good health a week, and 2 we muscle through. How is that?
The key was not realizing how long it could take to recover. One would think that 5 years of coddling the body would produce health, especially if it were only the presence of stressors that made the body ill. One would be wrong. That is my conclusion.
As you may or may not know, or care, I continue to sack the internet and popular media, as well as journals and medical books that I can understand for expereinces that are similar to mine. Well, I am beggining, strangely now, to find more tales that are similar, though not the same, and they are instructive.
I found the tale of a woman who had been ill like I had. She had also gotten ill as I had, through years of physical and nutritional punishment on her body. She decribes long days of work, fuled by low fat vegetarian cuisine. As she ate less meat, she grew more suscpetible to indigestion in the meats she did eat. soon gone were fish, eggs, and then milk. She drank fruit juices, and ate brown rice. Soon she was not able to digest fat well. But she persevered. In the end her system wekaened, and she broke. Her problems were similar to mine, severe lassitude, dizzyness, extraperceptions, headaches, paranoia, dark depression. The interesting thing I learned was this...she went to a chinese herbalist, and then later reintroduced appropriate nutrrition into her body, and it STILL TOOK 20 YEARS TO REGAIN HER HEALTH. Its a version of the same thing I did to myself, and a version of the same approach I took to healing. I was always wary to attribute all the problems to the abuse I visited on my body in 4 years of college water polo, 7.5 hours 3 days a week, 6 hours the other 4, and a vegetarian diet, that turned to a vegan diet, that turned to a low/no fat vegan diet, add a dash of starvation, and a bit of psychological stress and toxic water supply, because I reversed that course and fed my body ample amounts,good quiality fats, healing broths, fermented foods, raw fruits and vegetables, and supplements like only my loyal readers care to know...and it STILL TOOK 6 years to turn it around. Ok, its not 180 degrees yet, and the clock is still ticking, but the point is that I now view what is left to heal as the ravages of a constant state of stressor abuse.
I drew interesting comparisons and lessons from men in POW camps in WWII. Not to compare whatever horrors those men endured, but at an abstract level the stimuli ar ethe same- malnutrition, starvation, and grueling labor. I read their cases. many of them did not recover their health for decades, if ever.
Well, that what I am thinking of right now. I am not addressing hypoglycemia except as it is a symptom. I am healing my hypothalmus, I guess, the master endocrine gland, and healing a damaged digestive tract and all that entails.
The health is good these days. Hardly notice a thing. Lets say 5 days of good health a week, and 2 we muscle through. How is that?
posted by warnerk | 11:40 AM
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